Editor Fails to Fake Own Death!!

Or
Actual Mortality Strikes for First Time!!
The man who brought us Bat Boy, saw Satan’s face in clouds, smoke, volcano eruptions and his morning pancakes, disclosed that 12 U.S. Senators were aliens, asserted that the Loch Ness Monster was being used by the military and confirmed that Elvis was alive, then had faked his own death, again, has died. Or has he? Eddie Clontz, long-time editor of the Weekly World News, allegedly died of kidney and liver complications at the age of 56. And really, with a name like that, what else could he have done but run a supermarket tabloid? Where are his miracle doctors who kept women’s heads alive for years in jars now? What happened to the mystery space vegetables that cure all disease? Why didn’t his alien friends give him a lift to someplace where diabetes has been cured? It’s enough to make one lose one's faith in the media.