Tisch or Consequences

A Tisch-ket, a Casket

Or
Preston of the You’re Gone
In the last month, the New York Giants have lost more owners than games as Preston Robert Tisch succumbed to brain cancer at the age of 79, joining Wellington Mara in the coffin corner. One can only hope the increased mortality rate among New York sports owners continues. Once again, I’m looking at you, George. Tisch had made a name for himself before becoming a sports mogul, building a multi-billion dollar business empire and serving as postmaster general. But somehow the allure of the NFL outstripped stamp-licking, and in 1991 he bought half of the Giants. His attention to detail, or neurotic micromanaging, included personally hiring doormen for his hotels as the best salesmen for the property, and extended to his philanthropy – he not only helped found Meals on Wheels, but personally delivered meals to elderly people. For those of you with gambling inclinations, the Giants are 1-0 against the spread in games played after the death of an owner this year and are facing a beleagured Eagles squad likely to be led by ex-Rutgers QB Mike McMahon. And that’s your Panama Canal lock of the week.

James takes the game ball as he records the solo hit and moves into 12th place. Well, briefly moves into 12th place becauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse

This Is Your Death

Or
This Was Your Life
(Shared with Monty, despite it’s obviousness)

Or
Just Consequences
(Another epithaphany shared with Monty)

Or
Just Another Disembodied Voice from Your Past
(From Craig, who turned his nose up at my “obvious” suggestions. I wasn’t aware I should try to be cunning.)
Broadcasting pioneer Ralph Edwards has died of heart failure at the age of 92. The original purveyor of reality television, Edwards stunned incredibly oblivious audience members by calling them up on stage to be confronted by the faces of those they had wronged. Despite the fact that they saw the host of one of the most well-known programs of the 1950s, people seemed genuinely stunned at having been selected to be the latest subject to hear those disembodied voices, failing to do the math and realize they had about a 1 in 200 chance of being that week’s dope. Not one to take as good as he could dish out, Edwards threatened to fire every one of his staff if they ever tried to pull the This is Your Life routine on him. Edwards also suckered the poor town of Hot Springs, New Mexico into changing its name to Truth or Consequences to promote the town and his novelty game show that he had adapted from a hugely popular radio program. Edwards started Bob Barker’s career as the host of Truth or Consequences and that of Joseph A. Wapner on The People’s Court. Other programs Edwards helped create include Name that Tune, It Could be You and Funny Boners. Edwards and his son had been involved in a new version of This is Your Life, starring Regis Philbin, because he hasn’t been on TV enough.

Monty, as the only one to anticipate Edwards’ death, these are your 20 points. Monty’s Fords- Built to Last moves into 10th place.