Hyde and Go Reek

Henry Hyde, Republican hypocrite and Ann B. Davis lookalike, has died of complications from open-heart surgery at the age of 83. The former Illinois Congressman spearheaded the campaign to impeach President Clinton for perjury after he lied about the Billion Dollar BJ. During these proceedings, it was revealed that Hyde himself had a 4-year affair with a married woman in the late 1960s. Although he was 41 and married when that affair occurred, he chalked it up to a youthful indiscretion. As a Republican, he preached fiscal responsibility, but was the only member of Congress sued for gross negligence in the Savings and Loan crisis of the 1980s after an S&L where he had served as a board member was closed for creative bookkeeping and its establishment of an offshore bank in the Cayman Islands. For such devoted service to the country, he received the Presidential Medal of Screwed Up Worse than I Have So Far from President Bush in October 2007.