And Now You Know, the End, of the Story

Stand By for an Obituary
Right-wing deceiver of the aged and propagator of urban legend Paul Harvey has been declared dead, 5 years after radio’s Cryptkeeper was first suspected of having kicked the can attached to the string. Contaminating the airways since 1933, nationally since 1951, Harvey’s staccato delivery seamlessly blended news, human interest stories and advertising, thus equating his support for Joe McCarthy with his love of Ovaltine. He explained that “I am fiercely loyal to those willing to put their money where my mouth is.” His daily broadcasts, 5 minutes in the morning, 15 minutes at midday, at least half of it pregnant pauses, reached more than 24 million listeners on more than 1,200 radio stations at his peak. They were punctuated by his signature feature “The Rest of the Story,” a chronological look at the famous and infamous, with their identity a “mystery” until the end. A staunch conservative, Howdy Doody’s last living relative blasted homosexuality, left-wing radicals and black militants and reportedly was a close second to Gen. Curtis LeMay to be running mate for unsuccessful third-party presidential candidate George Wallace in 1968. He shocked his reactionary faithful in 1970, when he abandoned his support of President Nixon and the Vietnam War, concluding “Mr. President, I love you, but you’re wrong,” drawing a barrage of letters and phone calls, including one from the White House.