Autocratic Asphyxiation

(Stolen from The Daily Show)

Or
Happy Noose Year

Or
End of His Rope

Or
Swing and a Miss

Or
Rope-a-Dope

Or
King of Swing

Or
Public Noose-ance

Or
Say Hi to Hitler
(Stolen from the understated Philadelphia Daily News)
Iraq started a new New Year’s tradition with the dropping of the dictator, Saddam Hussein. Hussein finished his career at 2-2, with wins over Iran and Kuwait, but was 0-for-2 in non-regional contests with two losses to the United States. You can debate whether the U.S. is winning, but I think getting dragged out of a spider hole, paraded around in your underwear, the best courtroom sideshow since O.J. and rope burn in the jugular region are pretty clear indicators of not winning. Hussein’s gallows walk resulted from having ordered the deaths of 148 citizens in the town of Dujail after a failed assassination attempt. Other highlights include the aforementioned unprovoked attacks on Iraq and Kuwait, chemical weapons attacks on the Kurdish minority, delivering the chopped up body of a health minister that had criticized his conduct of the Iran-Iraq War to his wife and a thwarted assassination attempt on former President Bush. On the plus side, he was an enemy of Communism and Islamism, making him a good friend of the Reagan era White House, which supplied weapons later used against Bush-era troops in Gulf War I. He also made several contributions to several Detroit Catholic churches, earning him a key to he city in 1980.