Dairy of a Madison Back Room Man

Former Wisconsin Senator William Proxmire has answered the ethereal quorum call at the age of 90. Wisconsin’s junior Senate seat took a 90° turn to the left in 1957 when Proxmire won a special election to replace the late Communist-chasing Joseph McCarthy and kicked off a 32-year career of battling governmental waste. In 1975, Proxmire started handing his monthly Golden Fleece, recognizing moronic research programs, like one that spent $84,000 trying to determine why people fall in love or one that spent millions trying to determine if drunk fish were more aggressive than sober fish, questionable use of defense spending, like the $6,000, 17-page document commissioned by the U.S. Army to explain how to buy a bottle of Worcestershire sauce, and governmental projects like the $20,000 used to build an 800-foot limestone replica of the Great Wall of China in Bedford, Indiana. Long before John McCain and Russ Feingold had tackled campaign finance reform, Proxmire had stopped accepting campaign contributions, winning 64% of the vote in his last election in 1982 despite spending $145.10 on his campaign. He was as dedicated to physical fitness as he was to fiscal prudence, running several miles to his office each morning as he emerged as the Cal Ripken of the Senate, logging a record 10,252 consecutive roll call votes from 1966 to 1988. Other successes included campaigning against federal funding for the supersonic transport jet, allowing the French to lose millions all by themselves and an ultimately successful 20-year campaign to get the Senate to sign the UN resolution condemning genocide that arose from the Holocaust. On the downside, his sanctimonious, priggish approach won him few friends, limiting his influence and thwarting his presidential aspirations, one of his Golden Fleece awards got him sued for libel and the shallow bastard earned headlines for his facelift and two hair implant procedures.

Mark’s Beltway Boneyard III: Filibustering the Grim Reaper won his two-year Proxy fight while my Our Hearse is a Very, Very, Very Fine Hearse tags along to tie for third with 1 hit and 10 points.

Elsewhere…
Don’t Tell Mom, The B-Movie Producer’s Dead
(Props to Monty)
Robert Newmyer, producer of movies for the undiscerning viewer has died of a heart attack while exercising at the age of 49. Newmyer had recently mortgaged his two homes to raise money to film Phat Girlz, starring MoNique, so his was truly a merciful God. After a strong debut with sex, lies and videotape, Newmyer started watching a little too much ABCC Family and started turning out such direct to embarrassment films as Dennis the Menace Strikes Again, The Santa Clause, The Santa Clause 2 (and The Santa Clause 3 is in production), Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead and the film the killed John Candy, Wagons East.