Back to Ever Rest

Or
Over the Hillary

Or
On Top of the World, Looking Down on Creation… Again

Or
Sir Deadmund Hillary
(Props to Michelle)

Or
Looks like someone violated the 25-35-45 rule on Cliffhangers
(Kudos to Phil for taking the long road)

Or
Rocky Mountain Died
(Additional accolades for Phil)
Sir Edmund Hillary, allegedly the first man to sully the summit of Mount Everest, paving the way for it to become littered with Starbucks cups, granola wrappers and hundreds of ignored failed climbers, has died at the age of 88. Hillary was the humble son of a New Zealand beekeeper who fell in love with mountains in the 1950s and may have scaled the world’s tallest peak. However, there is no evidence to prove that Hillary actually reached the summit. While Hillary took a picture of Norgay, there is no such photo of Hillary. Hillary claimed that he had no idea it would be such a big deal when asked why he didn’t get a picture, which makes one wonder why he bothered to take a picture of a Sherpa. Last summer I took a picture of myself at the William McKinley Birthplace Memorial in Niles, Ohio – you go on a trip, you take pictures. I’m reasonably sure that Hillary pitched a tent 10 feet out of base camp, sent Norgay up alone and has been taking credit ever since. In 1960 he returned to the Himalayas to search for the Abominable Snowman*, but his con game here was less successful and he was able to produce only bear and antelope scalps that had been purported to have been from the Yeti. Other treks he took that were better than your summer vacations included an expedition across Antarctica to the South Pole and a flight with Neil Armstrong to the North Pole.

* - NOT writer’s embellishment.

Only one Pooligan had this one, so to summit up, Michelle Haus’ Die Another Day - Just Before November 30 takes 20 points and moves into first place. The first premature extrication of the year: Joe dropped Hillary after the 2006 GHI.