Guess Who's Not Coming to Dinner

Put away that extra place setting, Katherine Hepburn has accepted another invitation, passing away yesterday at the age of 96. A true screen legend, she was nominated for 12 Oscars, a record that stood until that bitch Meryl Streep came along last year, winning 4 times (as in twice as many as that no-talent Meryl), and pulling off the unique feat of winning in consecutive years (1967, 1968), as well as winning awards nearly 50 years apart (1933, 1981). The screen and the stage will forever be a little darker for her passing.

But softening the blow is the knowledge that with her death, I retake the lead in the Dead Pool, and really I think Kate would have wanted it that way. Kudos to others who called Kate's Crossing Over: Keith, Conni and Mark.

The new leaderboard:
1st: Me - 2 dead, 25 points
2nd: Kirsti - 2 dead, 24 points
(tie) Greg's Wily Veterans - 2 dead, 24 points
4th: Keith - 2 dead, 15 points
(tie) Conni - 2 dead, 15 points

And with JM finally unlocking the mystery of life and death and how to score points from it, we have a new person in the what the hell are you waiting for slot: Christine, who hasn't had a hit since Ted Williams went down swinging July 5, 2002. Shawn and John are the only others awaiting engraved invitations (not that there's anything wrong with that, boss man).

The Final Filibuster

After more than 70 years in politics, Strom Thurmond finally did something I can agree with. Thurmond answered the Grim Reaper's gavel last night at the age of 100, becoming President Post Mortem of the Senate. A fixture on the Senate floor even in his later years when he would sleep through or pass out during sessions, Thurmond's final wish was to be stuffed and mounted at his old Senate desk.

With his passing comes lots of shuffling on the leaderboard, and the end of one of my favorite pastimes - mocking Joan-Marie's success in the Dead Pool. With her correct call of the corpse, JM ends her 18-month shutout streak and leaps into a three-way tie for 8th. From tiny acorns, eh JM? More importantly, she claims family bragging rights, as brother Keith missed this one. Michelle, Shawn, Christine, Conni, and John also decided that a 100-year old man who had taken up residence in a hospital was not a good candidate for the Pool. Good call guys. This is especially vexing for Conni, who listed Strom last year, but not this - you thought he was getting better? And Joy and Jennifer, sweet vindication could have been yours had you stuck around.

But for the 5 who are in the game and called this correctly: Kirsti, Greg, Mark, JM and I, 4 points each, launching Kirsti and Greg into a first-place tie.

The Leaderboard:
1st: Kirsti 2 dead, 24 points
(tie) Greg's Wily Veterans 2 dead, 24 points
3rd: Me 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Greg's Fresh-faced Rookies 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Michelle 1 dead, 20 points

Let my people go

Best-selling novelist Leon Uris died Saturday at the age of 78, but no one noticed until today. Best known for writing Exodus and other really thick books that sold millions of copies but no one ever actually finished, Leon Uris was the JK Rowling of his day, except for the part about being an unemployed unwed mother. His last work, "O'Hara's Choice" is set for an October release, when it will hit the top of the best-seller lists buoyed by millions of people feeling obligated to read a master's last work. Wait until December and you can buy it used, but unopened, on amazon.com for 75% off.

Larry Don't Breath

Or
The first name in noise reduction does it again
(Stolen from Stiffs.com )
Hall of Famer Larry Doby, the second black to play in the major leagues, died Tuesday of cancer at the age of 78. Arriving in the major leagues 11 weeks after Jackie Robinson, Doby received little of the attention or fanfare that Robinson did, and does not share the same hallowed place in major league history. However, for their careers, Doby actually surpassed Robinson in terms of homers, RBI and runs scored. The Cleveland Indians did their part to right this wrong in 1994, retiring Doby's #14, and the Baseball Hall of Fame's Veterans Committee followed suit 4 years later, welcoming him into the hall.

Die Blacula, Die

In the wake of the deaths of some giants of entertainment, another passing of a long-in-the-tooth actor went overlooked. William Marshall, best known for playing Blacula, a black vampire, in a pair of blaxploitation films, died of Alzheimer's Disease this week at the age of 78. Marshall preferred his stage career, with meatier roles he could sink his teeth into, including Frederick Douglass and Othello. Fangs for the memories, Mr. Marshall.

Post Hume-ous

Long-time stage veteran Hume Cronyn died over the weekend at the age of 91, capping a week, in which "it wasn't good to be old," as my lovely fiancée Allison observed. A long-time character actor, Cronyn staged a revival of sorts in the 1980s in Cocoon, which served as a lifeboat for his career. It was also a good week for the dead pool, and this marked our first multiple hit, as both Conni and Keith notched their first hits of the year, good for 10 points each and a sixth place tie. At least someone in the family is doing well, eh Joan-Marie?

The Leaderboard
1st: Greg's Fresh-faced Rookies 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Kirsti 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Michelle 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Greg's Wily Veterans 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Me 1 dead, 20 points

Mockingbird's Revenge

Dead things apparently also come in threes. Last night, Gregory Peck died at the age of 87. Although he was a member of my traveling squad, he failed to make the cut on anyone's list. Appearing in 60 films, Peck is perhaps best known as lawyer Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, which was deemed the top screen hero earlier this month by the American Film Institute.

Good Night, David

Breaking News: The floodgates have opened, our second mortal-coil shuffling of the week. David Brinkley, rated as one of the giants of broadcast journalism for more than 50 years, has accepted a new assignment in the afterlife. He learned the true meaning of the term deadline last night at the age of 82 following complications from a fall.

Brinkley anchored only one pool entry - Greg's Wily Veterans, bringing him into a five-way tie for first with himself, his lovely wife Kirsti, their lovely friend Michelle and me, whose loveliness goes without saying. I don't want to suggest mob ties or anything, but the Chicago contingent has accounted for 4 of the 5 hits in the pool this far.

Now that we actually have 5 hits, the leaderboard returns
1st: Greg's Fresh-faced Rookies 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Kirsti 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Michelle 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Greg's Wily Veterans 1 dead, 20 points
(tie) Me 1 dead, 20 points

Chief of Half Staff

As foretold by Nancy Reagan's astrologer, former Reagan Chief of Staff Donald Regan died of cancer yesterday at the age of 84.

Or, in the words of Michelle, the lone person to accurately predict the president's patsy's passing: "Hooray! The death march of the Reagan administration begins!!!"

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I love this game.

If you take a look at the attached obit, apparently, "He served his country with distinction," is Washington-speak for "I'm glad the asshole is dead."

It's still anyone's game... well, Joan-Marie's shutout streak has now reached 18 months, so maybe not anyone's game, but I digress. There are now 4 folks tied with 1 cadaver and 20 points each. The leaderboard is attached, in case the lack of activity has made you forget who you picked.

A horse is a corpse, of course, of course

As the obits page continues to be a little lean and we continue to aimlessly jockey for position on the leaderboard, I tracked down an interesting tidbit. Spectacular Bid, contender for the 1978 Triple Crown, died of a heart attack at the age of 27 at his farm in upstate New York. Further study revealed that after stunning victories at the Kentucky Derby and Preakness, a safety pin became lodged in his hoof at the Belmont and the injured horse lost his bid for horsetory. After his career, he became a manestay on the stud circuit, earning $4,000 a pop, and producing 49 stakes winners. I know, enough horsing around with this stuff.

Casket Freddie Blassie

Ol' time wrasslin' superstar Classy Freddy Blassie got pinned by the Grim Reaper, dying Monday of a heart attack at the age of 85. One of the first wrestling stars of the television age, his name might also ring a bell with some as an evil manager of such WWF villains as Nikolai Volkoff or the Iron Sheik in the 1980s. Not one to be pinned down to a certain genre, he also recorded the novelty hit "Pencil-Necked Geek" and parodied "My Dinner with Andre" with "My Breakfast with Blassie." Given that we've spent the first half of the year with our backs to the mat, it's not surprising that no one had Blassie, so the Dead Pool is far from being slammed shut. As it stands, Greg, Kirsti and I are all tied with one lonely cadaver each.